January 11th, 2012

In a moment of reckless abandon/overenthusiastic zucchini slicing last night, I filleted my thumb on our mandoline. Which, aside from bleeding like crazy (actually…it’s still bleeding a little? am I dying?) and hurting like a bitch, it isn’t that big of a deal I guess. Stick a bandaid on it and move on.

J/K IT’S ACTUALLY A BIG PAIN IN THE ASS! Here’s a growing list of things that apparently you need a right thumb for (and kind of suck to do without one):

  • Fasten/unfasten a bra
  • Peel a banana
  • Open a packet of almond butter
  • Blow dry hair with a round brush
  • Button jeans
  • Open/close an umbrella (while your left hand is full)
  • Hit the space bar
  • Hitchhike effectively

The banana one was especially troubling. I just want to eat a banana at my desk like a normal office chimp, man. It took me 10 minutes to open it! At one point I considered asking a coworker to open it for me but that just seemed too weird.

  1. thatsmyrabbit said: There are culinary classes for the public offered where I work and last night (1/11) two girls in a class sliced their thumbs on mandolines too. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
  2. beccarue said: You and Clay have so MUCH in common right now….poor dudes!
  3. bluelightseven said: SO TRUE. Mandolines and thumbs are not friends. Thumbs and daily activities are best friends.
  4. blairsings said: I would’ve opened your banana for you. Is that a weird response? Damn I think it is. Oh well. I hope it heals quickly!!
  5. drinkyourjuice said: I NEVER FASTEN OR UNFASTEN MY BRAS I JUST PUT THEM ON OVER MY HEAD LIKE TEESHIRTS THE FUTURE IS NOW KATIE THE FUTURE IS NOW
  6. girlyoulion said: wait hold on, packet of almond butter? it comes in packets? where??
  7. reallykatie posted this
28 notes
Short URL for this post: http://tmblr.co/ZgFoayEb-Ma3